The Write Decision

Rashard Mendenhall

The recent Rashard Mendenhall retirement announcement brought me back to college. One of the hardest football decisions I ever had to make came during my red-shirt sophomore year at Findlay. In order to graduate on time I needed to take an English class that was only offered during the same time as football practice.

 As if it wasn’t hard enough to be a poem-writing tight-end at a football school, I was a poem-writing tight-end missing practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Needless to say I wasn’t seeing much playing time for that coach, but I understood and thought my playing time was fair that year considering the situation.

 I’ll never forget the conversation with the coach at the time. He’s no longer at the school and didn’t last long in that position, but before moving on, he spent plenty of time telling me what kind of player I was. He said something about me being a poor teammate and afraid to do the right thing for the team. To which I replied by hanging my head and just wanting to get the hell out of his office with a little dignity.

The response I offered him was that in order to graduate on time I would have to take this class, at this time, or stay another semester because this class was a requirement for my major. He didn’t seem to care much about my major. But then again, reading and writing poetry is not for everyone. One has to appreciate these things in order to understand them. What I understood though even then, was who I was. I was a pretty decent football player but I was also a passionate writer, assistant editor of The Envoy and team player off the field in my writing groups. I was a writer as much as I was a football player.

 The irony here is that my professors were my biggest fans on the field, did everything they could to be supportive of our team and generally just cared about me as a person. Rather than argue this point about equally being a writer and football player, I channeled it, and that sequence of events changed my mindset about writing. It motivated me to be a better writer and it gave me a reassuring sense of confidence that I was doing what was right.

I mean, this was college right? — Higher education; preparing for life’s journey through curriculum application and character development… Maybe at Alabama or Miami, football players do not miss practices for English class. Of course classes are offered more frequently to prevent that from occurring.

At the end of the day, college is about experiences, choices, getting an education and growing. I learned during that time; what is popular is not always easy. But more than anything, what I learned was having balance to my life was imperative.

When I read of Mendenhall’s retirement, I thought to myself, there is a true professional. Someone who has figured it out; someone on our team.

It Starts with School Breakfast

breakfast at school

As a kid, there was always food in the refrigerator for us to eat before school. My mom worked nights and usually didn’t get home before we were off to school, but she always made sure there was enough to eat. There was always milk in the fridge, cereal, pancakes, fruit of some kind, toast and probably some junk food too.

Having the usual breakfast foods around the house was something I took for granted as a kid. My family didn’t have a whole lot in comparison to today’s standards, but it was more than enough. And by enough, I mean I wasn’t one of the kids that went to the cafeteria before school started to eat breakfast with the poor kids. (That’s what we called the handful of kids that were on the free and reduced lunch program) No one was mean to them or anything like that; in fact most of them were my friends by the time we graduated high school. However we all know kids can be mean, especially in middle school; and every differentiating factor is a finger-pointing big deal.

Good thing the older we get the wiser we become, because I’ve learned that eating breakfast at school just may be the most important thing a student does at school! A recent study concluded that kids who eat breakfast and are physically active perform better on standardized tests, have fewer behavior issues at school and have increased memory and focus.

This week is National School Breakfast Week and the work being done by the National Dairy Council and Feeding America to address issues like Hunger and School Breakfast Initiatives is needed more now than ever. More parents are unemployed than in recent history which means more families are struggling to get by. The negative stigma of eating breakfast at school started a long time ago, and has manifested into an unfortunate reality. Kids, who eat breakfast at school or who participate in the free and reduced meal program, in many places, unfortunately feel like they are wearing a scarlet letter. They are pressured into embarrassment and made to feel as though they are different because they eat breakfast at school. Because they are hungry. In many instances, eating at school is the only place a child does eat.

Being the leaders off the field and true professionals they are, twenty-five NFL players are eating school breakfast this week in connection with the Fuel Up to Play 60 program to raise awareness and address this stereotype. We can do our part too by supporting school meal programs, considering a donation to your local food pantry and not pointing fingers at the hungry kids.

Oiler Tradition

findlayI’m not sure if anyone in their right mind would choose Findlay, Ohio as a vacation destination this time of year; or any time of year for that matter. But here I am. Day two of six in Findlay enjoying my time on my Alma Matter campus speaking to college students, coaches, staff and administrators about their futures, career paths, the future of the University’s sports programs, the benefit of internships, sports marketing and management, offensive and defensive line play, digital marketing and communications, NFL scouts, new buildings and sports facilities, campus writing publications and of course, the weather.

 It’s been almost twelve years since I graduated from the University of Findlay and I’m still proud of the fact that I graduated from here. When I was an eighteen year old kid I didn’t know what I didn’t know; and at 34, I still don’t. But I do know there are certain events in one’s life that whether one realizes it or not at the time, happen for a reason. I think coming to the University of Findlay after high school while at the time, I wasn’t sure was right for me, turned out to be a great decision. I’m still great friends with my teammates from the days of the collegiate gridiron. It was here and with them that I learned to be perseverant and to work my ass off for the greater good. That greater good was Findlay Football and a better opportunity and life than otherwise would have been possible for a kid from Glandorf, Ohio.  While it all started as a kid in back yard football games and with my coaches from the Ottawa-Glandorf communities, Findlay was the next step.

It was here that I met and quickly loved a football coach that knew how to motivate and inspire in a way that words cannot give justice. Coach Dick Strahm is one of the greatest human beings I’ve ever met and possibly to ever walk the Earth. If you haven’t had the chance to play for Coach or know his story, it may be hard to believe that the greatest of the great resides in Findlay, Ohio, but that is the case. He leads by example and has taught so many of us over the years how to do the same. The tradition he began and instilled in me, is much in part why I am on campus this week sharing what I am able to share. Whether it be my time, my experiences or my humble expertise in areas of my profession, I am here to continue an Oiler tradition that many before me have been passionate about and contributed to.

Rachel’s Challenge

During Jim Valvano’s 1993 Espy Awards Speech, he encouraged us to never give up, not ever give up. That speech still lives bookmarked on my favorites and is referenced when I need a little motivation.

Today, in a tearful Columbus, Ohio ball room on the second floor of the Renaissance Hotel, Darrell Scott, father of the first homicide victim from the Columbine School shooting, Rachel Scott, addressed a room full of middle school educators. I was there with my work as well and was fortunate to listen in. He shared his daughter’s compelling story with us and quite frankly I don’t know how he had the strength to watch the video that played on the two projection screens.

The similarities were astounding and equally as insightful in the back of my mind when I thought of Jimmy V’s passion and sincerity in his delivery; Don’t give up, don’t ever give up. Rachel Scott was only 15 years old when she lost her life to ignorant violence but before she left, she had a dream and a vision of making the world a better place. Born from that vision, was Rachel’s Challenge. Listening to Darrell Scott share his little girl’s dreams with a room of strangers was inspiring. Because not only was his daughter killed that day but his son was also in that school and witnessed two of his friends murdered in cold blood. I can’t imagine the pain that family has endured… It seems so unjust and so vulgar to be put into a situation of that magnitude; but if you believe everything happens for a reason, I hope you’ll investigate the story of Rachel Scott more in depth because it truly is a story of miracles.

While I shook Darrell’s hand after his talk, I could sense a bit of numbness in his expression and somber in his voice just like in this video. – It takes a strong individual to forgive when the pain is so great and the loss so special. Mr. Scott talked about prejudging people when we meet them for the first time and offered a suggestion that if we look for the good in people, we will see it; and of course viceversa… (If the father of a slain daughter can forgive, maybe I can forgive as well and find the good in others before noticing the bad, right?)

Today’s experience left me feeling compelled to do something supportive; to carry out Rachel’s wish; so I share Rachel’s challenge in the best way I know how… my writing. Jim Valvano challenged his audience to accomplish three things everyday; to laugh, to spend some time in thought, and to have your emotions brought to tears. He said if you can do those three things everyday you will have lived that day to it’s fullest.

Thank you Mr. Scott; Jimmy V would have been proud of all of us today, especially you.